Life and Death

How long had we been waiting? I glanced at my watch. Nine PM. Nine hours. Anticipation was palpable, and my feet were getting numb as I sat tense upon a stool. I felt guilty for feeling uncomfortable as I glanced at Renai, a young mother who had been laboring for a day prior to seeking help at the clinic.

The building was empty except for the laboring mother, two Sudanese women, three nurses, and Benjamin, our Mabaan health worker. A hot day had melted into a muggy evening; moist heat caused the little gnats to stick to skin. Lizards and spiders dodged about on the concrete walls and enjoyed an endless menagerie of insects; bugs drawn inside by mesmerizing light.

My attention returned to the bed beside me as Renai silently endured another contraction. Baby was still not progressing and the mother was tiring. In an effort to encourage their young friend, the Sudanese ladies joked about their delivery experiences... which were plentiful, with twenty-one children between them!

A nurse phoned Dr Rob to give an update, I started an IV to provide hydration and energy for the laborer, and Renai drifted to a much-needed sleep.

The following morning, an Oxytocin drip was initiated to help increase the strength of Renai's contractions. Baby's position seemed to be fine, the heart rate was good, so we waited for the new little somebody to make an arrival.

Four hours later, we held a healthy and sturdy 9.3lb baby boy. The baby's father beamed with pride as he held his first son. And after receiving her child, Renai's stoic features softened into a beautiful smile of discovery.

Meanwhile, the other five stations at the clinic buzzed with activity as people were unaware of the new life that began just behind the blue curtain.

* * *

After a full and rewarding day at the clinic, I prepared for my weekly afternoon Bible club with the local children. Praying that Jesus would provide the wisdom and energy needed, I set out for the Nutrition Village. Along the way, groups of children skipped around me and shouted, "Ban Keegin!" Which literally means "Village of Children", although the actual name of where we meet is the "Ban Keeyin", or "Village of Hope". Besides the weekly kids' club and an occasional Sunday School class, there are no activities for Mabaan children.

The Nutrition Village is a recovery compound run by a missionary and helps children and families obtain the food, medicine and education needed for healing. One of the workers there, Isaiah, helps translate for me. The children recovering at the Village sometimes join the group of local kids for story-time and coloring.

After singing together in Mabaan and kicking around the new soccer ball, the children settled in the shade of a tree to hear the story. We were working through the book of Exodus, and reached the description of the Tabernacle. I prayed, then described Israel's portable dwelling place for God. Having previously told about the golden calf, I explained how God provided a way for the people to see God's presence within their village so they would remember Him; God wants a relationship with His people and He makes Himself accessible. Describing the altar and the golden laver, I explained how God sent Jesus to live a perfect life here on earth. Then Jesus willingly died on the cross to pay the debt for everyone's sin. And, like the laver signified, we can be washed clean if we accept His sacrifice and surrender our sin.

I paused and asked if any of the 'keegin' had any questions. A few boys asked if they could have a "relationship with Jesus too". I was so thrilled!!! So I explained Jesus' love for each of them again and the group prayed together.

Toward the end of the prayer, we were thanking Jesus for His love and forgiveness when one of the children suddenly started hitting the others. Philemon seemed uncontrollable in his abusive actions, so I had Isaac bring him away from the group to talk. Philemon had been increasingly agitated, mischievous, and abusive to others over the past few weeks. When I asked him why he hurt others, he didn't know. I considered his family as we talked. Philemon's grandfather was a godly man, but his grandmother and father follow tribal beliefs. Combined with conflicts of faith, the family dealt with the effects of Sudan's political upheaval. Like all the other families in Doro, they escaped during heavy warfare of the past decade, survived as refugees, and relocated home four years ago. God gave me compassion to glimpse the struggles, the lonliness, the confusion that six-yr-old Philemon must have to endure through his family life.

I gave Philemon a hug and told him how Jesus loves him and wants to have a friendship with him. We talked about how special each person that God created is, and how it hurts Jesus when we sin and hurt others. I asked him if he wanted to have a friendship with Jesus as well, and I'll never forget the nod "yes" and his calm demeanor as we prayed. A new life was born! As Paul observes in Romans 8, "if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live," (vs. 13).

That night at the compound, I was pretty elated about the new baby and my little brothers who trusted Jesus. I was sharing the exciting news with other missionaries when we heard Grace urgently summon Joanna to the Nutrition Village. We later learned that a little boy, severely malnourished and suffering the late stages of a complicated illness, was struggling to hold onto life. The mother had taken him to the witch doctor previously and nothing helped. We prayed that the child would be healed and that God would receive the glory; that the child's mother would see God's healing power and would trust Him. How this mother survived emotionally is a wonder; she was a day's walk from home in a foreign area, two of her children had died previously, she had another sick child at home and her tiny boy was dying. We gave medicines and prayed.

I awoke during the night to the sounds of wailing women and I knew. Sometimes God doesn't answer prayer in the manner that I expect is "right". But I can have confidence that He loves His creation, His people.

Reading further in Romans 8, I was encouraged by this observation on life, death, and suffering; "For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. For the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it in hope; because the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now. Not only that, but we also who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body," (vss. 18-23).

Life is found in dying to this mortal self, that one may gain what is Eternal.