Illustration in the Sky

The brilliance of an unblemished sky captivated me that first night in Sudan. The stars were individual points of light, so numerous, they merged to form sparkling waves across the heavens. As if reuniting with an old friend, my eyes naturally sought out a pattern of seven stars in the Northern sky. Ursa Major, or more specifically, the Big Dipper had always been my favorite constellation. Why? It was the easiest to pick out, its a reference to other constellations, and I liked the notion of God placing a kitchen utensil in the sky. I was accustomed to viewing the Dipper from the States where it rested in a lateral position, as if some unseen Hand was holding it under a faucet to be filled. But viewed from equatorial Africa, the Dipper is straight up and down; its contents spilling into the infinite black ocean of night.

Appreciating an allegory, I found myself reciting something that Paul had written to Timothy; "I am already being poured out as a drink offering," (2 Tim 4:6). Feeling parched from the heat of the day, I began to think more deeply about the purpose of a dipper; how refreshing a cup of water would be right then. A scene from the film Ben-Hur flashed in my mind: the enslaved hero has been forced to march through the desert and is denied water by his captors. Weak and without hope, he collapses to the sand. But just when he wants to die, Someone dips into the well and offers him a drink of life-sustaining water. After satisfying his thirst, Ben-Hur gazes into the loving eyes of his Savior, and he is captivated. I considered how I had been filled in the States for so many years; filled with Bible stories from childhood, theology studies in college, filled by the godly counsel of many. Standing beneath the tilted Dipper, I eagerly asked God to pour out what He had infused in me on this Sudanese soil: the True Living Water.

My first two months at Doro passed too quickly. At first the pouring came easy; I had mornings to study Mabaan and afternoons to learn the clinic. I was purposeful about developing relationships; played with kids and drank chai with local ladies. But then I moved into my role at the clinic and settled into routine. And after a child with cancer died, I began to feel like my well was going dry. Long hours in the clinic, children passing into eternity from preventable conditions, inability to communicate in the local dialects, and the steep cultural learning curve all sapped my energy. I would come back from a day at the clinic in time to help with dinner, perform a few tasks, then turn in. Time's hourglass buried my plans in ceaseless sands; each day I was getting further behind in my outreach and language-learning goals. And still there were more children suffering from malnutrition, seizures, malaria; more tiny lives silenced in tireless sleep.

How could I continue being poured out? After all, sharing Jesus’ love is not a matter of location, it’s a unending lifestyle, a commandment, an honor that He has given. How then was I to be filled? I found renewal by “looking unto Jesus,” Hebrews 12:2.

Two stars on the front of the Big Dipper’s cup point up to Polaris, the North Star. Since the earth’s North Pole points to Polaris and the earth rotates around the poles, Polaris remains a constant point in the sky. The Big Dipper appears to rotate around the North Star, and it can serve as a 24-hour clock. The constancy of the North Pole captivated me. Whatever the position of the Big Dipper; whether being poured out or filled, at all times, it looks to the consistent star.

I am currently in Nairobi for an opportunity to rest and resupply. And although my ladle is in a more recumbent position, I see the Truth in the Creator’s heavenly illustration. It doesn’t matter where or when I am, if I perceive myself as being filled or poured out, my purpose is to point to Christ. He is the Source of Living Water, the Constant One.

After speaking about being poured out, Paul finishes his thought to Timothy in verses 7 and 8: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing.”